Day 8

Day 8: A picture that makes you laugh.

This post was a no brainer! This pic absolutely cracks me up everytime I see it. This is my husband. During the holidays I cross stitched gifts for his family. Well, I have never been able to accomplish a french knot. I was trying and trying and cussing and cussing. He was highly amused by my antics which only pissed me off even more. So of course I said "Well if you think its so easy, you come do it!" Which he did. This was him trying and failing!

Day 7

Day 7: Post a picture of your most treasured item.

Ok first I have to apologize for the blog throw up this morning!! I ran away with my husband this weekend and am just now sitting down to my computer.

This is a cookbook. As you can see its super old and very used. When my dad passed away I was very young and the situation was very bad within my family. This book and one other cookbook were the only things I got to take from my father's home. And believe it or not, I'm completely ok with it. This book was one of his most treasured items and now its mine. I've only made a few things out of it, but one day when I get brave I'll try more. But for now, I hold it closely to my heart and can't wait to pass it on to my children.

Day 6

Day 6: A person you would like to trade places with for a day.

Ok, first off, I am not a democrat. Nor did I vote for Obama and I'm not about to get into a debate on politics. I chose Michelle Obama as the person I would trade places with for a day because of one reason and one reason only, MILITARY FAMILES.

She is the one person in the world who can bring alot of attention to military families and the hardships they go through. Wives are left behind with young children, or pregnant or just left behind miles and miles away from family while their husbands go off to war. Then sometimes their tasked with the God awful job of burying their beloved one.

I don't think military wives get enough recognition or credit. I have a friend who tried for years to conceive, they finally did and her husband was sent off on his umpteenth deployment and didn't even get to see his son be born. I have friends who have been through moves and sicknesses, deaths, and many other hard life changes. Thankfully, I am still currently the only one who has ever had to bury my loved one. I pray everyday that my friends never have to experience that pain. I want to watch them grow their families and grow old and senial with me!

If you could trade places with one person for one day, who would it be and why?

Day 5

Day 5: Post a picture of your favorite memory.

I don't even remember how old I was in this picture. Maybe 10? But it's me and my daddy on a daddy/daughter lunch cruise in Ft Myers. We were on a boat that cruised up the intercoastal and it was alot of fun. I have hundreds of memories of my father, but this one stands out among them. This picture was even featured in our hometown newspaper. If you google "Daddy's girl" my picture will be the first thing to pop up. I worshipped my father. He passed away 13 years ago and there is not a day that goes by that I don't miss him. I am so grateful that I have this memory of an afternoon on a boat with him to look back on when I'm feeling sad.

Day 4

Day 4: Post a picture of your best friend

Well, so far this has been a no brainer post. Meet my BFF Erin. She is a fellow blogger and at the time we became friends we were both military wives. We met via the interwebs and I couldn't be happier. It's been almost 5 years and we're still just as close today as we were the day we met.

The picture above was last summer here in Utah when we FINALLY met in person. It was awesome!! We got along just as well in person as we do online. Which is good because we usually spend an average of 12+ hrs talking every day. Yes, every single day. Our husbands do not understand our relationship and I'm pretty sure mine gets a little jealous at times. He's starting to understand a little, but I just keep explaining that she's been around longer :)

Erin has been with me through one horrible marriage, crappy divorce, pyscho boyfriends, miscarriages, new marriages, etc. And currently she's guiding my way through temping and charting and trying to conceive. And I know once I do get pregnant, she'll be there for all the craziness that entails!! So Erin, here's to many many more years of chats, babies, and friendship!!

Day 3

Day 3: Post a picture of the cast from your favorite TV show.

Ok, so this was SUPER hard as I have a huge addiction to reality television and other drama's on once a week. Currently, I'm watching my new favorite show that also happens to be one of the #1 shows for CBS.

Meet the Reagan's. They are the family centered around the show Blue Bloods. They're a few generations of NYPD cops. Dad (Tom Selleck) is the NYPD police commissioner, Danny (Donnie Wahlberg) a hotshot detective, Jamie (Will Estes) a rookie street cop, Grandpa (?) retired cop, and Erin (Bridget Moynahan) the Assistant District Attorney.

This family has known its share of tragedy so it's easy to relate. They had an older brother who was killed in the line of duty. The mom passed away of cancer. Erin is recovering from a divorce. Danny did two tours in Iraq/Afghanistan. Then, they have this realistic family togetherness where they sit down to dinner every Sunday no matter how brief. If you sit down and just watch one episode, any episode, you'll be hooked.

I like this show for a number of reasons. First, my BFF living in NYC, Smiley, has always love Donnie Wahlberg. Me, not so much. But she heard about his new show and even found where they were taping in the streets. Hearing her excitement got me excited. Then I found out that Tom was in it. I have a completely unhealthy normal crush on Tom Selleck. Hello?? Who doesn't love a 6ft tall man who carries a gun and has the perfect mustache?? Oh and if you've never seen him as Jesse Stone in that series of CBS movies, run to Redbox NOW!! Then, after a couple episodes I noticed the adorable Will Estes. Last week they even showed him with his shirt off and I had to go out in the snow to cool down. :)

Then there's this mysterious back story of how the older brother was killed and some secret society called the Blue Templar. Not so much on this topic yet, but I'm excited for more. And if anyone from CBS happens upon my little blog, please PLEASE renew this show for a second season and many more!!!

Baby Blues

Blogs are where you're supposed to let your emotions run free, right?? Well, I totally need to.

Currently, B and I are trying to conceive. And yes, I get that we haven't been trying that long and I should just "be patient" and all that. But I'm seriously upset and frustrated with the subject of babies. As of right this minute there are 16 women in my inner circle who are pregnant. Majority of them for the second time. Please don't mistake my point here. I am completely happy for these women. Some of them are my closest of friends. I am thrilled that they are expanding their family. I am just extremely frustrated that I am not.

I love my son with everything that is in me. He is the absolute light of my life. But I do not now nor have I ever really loved his father. Booger was a complete OOPS! but that has never changed how I feel about him. But now that I have actually found the man that I love enough to actually WANT to have babies with, it is just not happening!!

I know that conception is realistic in a very short window each month so we are actually going to start the temping and charting and all that fun stuff as soon as Flo makes her appearance next week. Trust me, I am not pregnant this month. I just know.

I truly hope that I am not offending anyone out there in the blogosphere because I know that there are women who have had much more serious problems with fertility than I seem to be. But after being on depo for almost 5 years after my son was born I have serious concerns about the damage I may have done to my body for it not to be conceiving. And it literally feels like I'm the only person NOT pregnant right now!

I just want to give my husband the joy of having a child. The amazing 9 months of pregnancy, the birth, watch him hold our baby for the first time. But being completely a little impatient, I want that NOW! I want to reproduce with the man I love. And as happy as I am for my friends who are getting to experience all this wonderfulness, I am seriously sad. I cry everytime another one tells me she's pregnant. I bawled all through Grey's Anatomy last week watching Callie get her ultrasound. I live in Utah where you can't sneeze without running into 5 pregnant women. I look at their bellies and it honestly makes me just hurt because I want that so badly.

I know "it will happen" and just "be patient, give it time". Yeah, I get all that. I truly do. But this is my blog and I'll cry if I want to!